Niki Anderson ~ Author & Speaker

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Copycats

Posted on March 7, 2010 at 1:40 AM

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While preparing tax data for my accountant this week, I took a break from the computer and committed to finishing the unsavory job. My interlude was not without concern for readers waiting perhaps for the next blog on lifestyle balance.

 

An accusation crossed my mind. Like other authors, I ought to be blogging more. Emphasis on the word “ought.”

 

Momentarily, I fell prey to the very frustration I’m disarming in my blog today. It’s number three among the eight rebuttals we hear from people striving to balance their lives. “I ought to be able to do as much as others do.” Sound familiar?

 

Interestingly, a few days ago a dear friend said something similar. “When I see all you’re doing, I think I should be doing more.” While she was comparing her “much” to my “much,” I was measuring myself by fellow writers for their more frequent blogs. And you can bet my “fellow authors” often cast side glances at someone doing one thing or another more than they.

 

Whew! The picture wears me out just verbalizing it. The nasty cycle is a whirl of comparison, competition, and copycat-ing.

If you allow the three C’s past your doorstep and in your house, you’ll be inviting three thieves. They’ll rob you of balance by distracting your concentration from what God has directed only you to do (be it ever so humble as taxes!).

 

Comparison will sink your esteem, forever pointing to someone you greatly admire. Competition will nurture jealousy with its assurances that you’ll never be equal to your role model. Copycat-ing will rob you of personal development and blind you to your own marvelous distinction. Suddenly you’re off kilter and there goes balance.

 

“What others are doing” is their business whether it’s superior, less, or merely different from what life requires of you.

 

Balance demands the deliberation of focus. Don’t let your eyes or attention turn you aside to “what others are doing.” Stick to your own tasks and do them joyfully to the glory of God. Besides, originals have more fun than copycats.

 

Anyone care to share which of the three C’s you’ve overcome or hope to? I’m giving a copy of Ins-pur-r-rational Stories for Cat Lovers to the third confessor who comments. Click the “comments” to the right of the copycats pictured above.  

 

Comparison is futile. No amount of admiration will ever turn a train into an airplane. Keep your eyes on the track ahead. You may never fly, but you’ll never derail. --NA

 

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16 Comments

Reply Debbie
07:45 PM on March 08, 2010 
I overcame the Comparison C years ago Niki. I am much too busy, and old, to try to compare myself to anyone else. I have my yardwork, housework, crafts, an array of critters, a good man, a wonderful grown son, and 4 wonderful Grandchildren to keep focused. I simply don't have the time nor desire to compare myself to anyone else. We are each unique in what is important to us.

And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.

Hugs, Deb
Reply Cindy Scinto
07:49 PM on March 08, 2010 
Oh, Niki--this is so true. People especially compare themselves to me because of my health. They are intimidated by how much I get done. But they don't see that part of my schedule is for exercise, rest, quiet time, and even sleeping late on some days. When I say I am busy with a "full" schedule, rest time is included. But even I get overdone--so thank you for this reminder.
Reply nikianderson
09:07 PM on March 08, 2010 
Debbie says...
I overcame the Comparison C years ago Niki. I am much too busy, and old, to try to compare myself to anyone else. I have my yardwork, housework, crafts, an array of critters, a good man, a wonderful grown son, and 4 wonderful Grandchildren to keep focused. I simply don't have the time nor desire to compare myself to anyone else. We are each unique in what is important to us.

And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.

Hugs, Deb
Reply nikianderson
09:11 PM on March 08, 2010 
Debbie says...
I overcame the Comparison C years ago Niki. I am much too busy, and old, to try to compare myself to anyone else. I have my yardwork, housework, crafts, an array of critters, a good man, a wonderful grown son, and 4 wonderful Grandchildren to keep focused. I simply don't have the time nor desire to compare myself to anyone else. We are each unique in what is important to us.

And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.

Hugs, Deb

Debbie, I think that aging helps a lot with the reduction of comparing. With age and satisfying occupations and usefulness, who wants to trade places with another? My mother used to say, "If everyone threw their problems into the street and left them for anyone to pick-up, we'll all return to our own troubles and take them back home." So why wish to be someone else or waste time on the effort?
Reply nikianderson
09:14 PM on March 08, 2010 
Cindy Scinto says...
Oh, Niki--this is so true. People especially compare themselves to me because of my health. They are intimidated by how much I get done. But they don't see that part of my schedule is for exercise, rest, quiet time, and even sleeping late on some days. When I say I am busy with a "full" schedule, rest time is included. But even I get overdone--so thank you for this reminder.

I'm also sensitive about the truth in saying, "I'm very busy." Because like you, those full days include my time alone with God, a short nap if necessary, walking and stretching, and other balancing actions. But too frequently, when people say they're busy, they mean they're frenetic and are living quite unbalanced lives.
Reply Niki Turner
11:03 PM on March 08, 2010 
Wonderful post! Avoiding the comparison trap is so hard sometimes. As a pastor's wife it hits hard when you start looking at church numbers and building size and so forth. My husband always reminds me of the verse that says "comparing ourselves among ourselves, this is not wise!"
Thank you!
(another) Niki
Reply nikianderson
11:20 PM on March 08, 2010 
Niki Turner says...
Wonderful post! Avoiding the comparison trap is so hard sometimes. As a pastor's wife it hits hard when you start looking at church numbers and building size and so forth. My husband always reminds me of the verse that says "comparing ourselves among ourselves, this is not wise!"
Thank you!
(another) Niki

Hi "Another Niki", Not many of us spell our name this way! Bless your heart as you serve in the sensitive but powerful role of pastor's wife. I hold the highest esteem for women filling that ministry. But numbers mean little; he saved the Israelites by few and my many. I almost used the Bible verse you quoted for the end of my blog. Not only is it unwise to compare ourselves, it leads to feelings of superiority or despair. Keeping focused on Jesus and his personal leadership of our lives keeps us steady. Thanks for posting! You're the third to comment. You won the book! Please send your snail mail address to niki@nikianderson.net.
Reply Tina
06:59 AM on March 09, 2010 
Ok Nikki I think I am the third cofessor on your blog...lol. It is kind of funny because I never thought of my self as suffering from one of the 3 "C"'s but more recently I have found myself doing just that..."comparrison". It has come from being with such inspiring and wonderful women in Oasis, they all are such a blessing but when I hear of time in other countries, the amount of missionary work done, and the things they plan in the future it is difficult not to look back (or forward) with my own life and wish I had sought more of that kind of service and experience. I love your very thought provoking blogs.
Reply niki anderson
10:02 AM on March 09, 2010 
Tina says...
Ok Nikki I think I am the third cofessor on your blog...lol. It is kind of funny because I never thought of my self as suffering from one of the 3 "C"'s but more recently I have found myself doing just that..."comparrison". It has come from being with such inspiring and wonderful women in Oasis, they all are such a blessing but when I hear of time in other countries, the amount of missionary work done, and the things they plan in the future it is difficult not to look back (or forward) with my own life and wish I had sought more of that kind of service and experience. I love your very thought provoking blogs.
Reply Niki Anderson
10:07 AM on March 09, 2010 
[/niki anderson] Tina, I think we all compare ourselves, even subconsciously. It's important to remember that if comparison inspires us, it is not a negative thing. But if it lands us in a pile of "Everybody is better than me; I'm not much use to God; I wish I'd done this that, or the other," then our focus has shifted to ME, and has moved away from a focus on God and how he has redeemed us and will use us in the future. You are a precious vessel of God's Spirit, Tina, so be inspired, not discouraged.
Reply Laura Frantz
11:40 AM on March 11, 2010 
Dear Niki, Once again you have spoken truth at just the right time! As a new author It is very hard for me not to look around and see how others are doing on their writing journey. Comparison is a huge creativity killer. Plus I'm learning that it's a disservice to our Creator who has placed each of us on a particular path and wants us to run our own race, not question why we can't run someone elses. I am a slow learner, I'm afraid, but knowing authors like you who are running their race well and not getting sidelined is a huge help. Bless you for your words of wisdom.
Reply toultvoni
03:59 PM on September 02, 2010 
Very Interesting!
Thank You!
Reply toultvoni
09:29 AM on September 04, 2010 
Very Interesting!
Thank You!
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08:50 PM on September 04, 2010 
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08:33 AM on September 08, 2010 
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Reply Zyralnedyk
05:54 AM on August 21, 2011 
We here in the Collaborative States have prostrate a fortune of ease lately fretting about our public debt. But while we as a result of loads of long green, we may not be in approaching as bad of shape as some of our peers.

When indecent viewable debt is considered as a cut of a nation?s crude tame yield, it turns discernible Japan takes the No. 1 spot. Japan's in hock is more than dishonest its annual great tame by-product, according to innumerable estimates.

During dissimilarity the United States? obscene chauvinistic in dire straits is closer to 100 percent of outrageous house-trained issue, according to estimates from the International Fiscal Dough and the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development.

That still puts the U.S. in heartier change than other industrialized nations including Greece, Italy and Ireland, according to the OECD estimates. Of seminar, those are to each the European countries whose elevated in financial difficulty levels take raised concerns in modern months.

Here are the 10 developed countries with the most gross in financial difficulty, compared to GDP, based on the OECD's projections after 2011:

Japan - 213 percent of GDP
Greece - 157 percent
Italy - 129 percent
Iceland - 121 percent
Ireland - 120 percent
Portugal - 111 percent
United States - 101 percent
Belgium - 101 percent
France - 97 percent
Mutual Domain - 89 percent

Worries with regard to the growing U.S. debt, combined with concerns far the arbitrary procedure for dealing with that in hock, played into Authoritative & In reduced circumstances's current finding to cut the rating on the nation?s long-term debt securities one notch to AA+ from the highest AAA rating.

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