Niki Anderson ~ Author & Speaker
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Copycats
| Posted on March 7, 2010 at 1:40 AM |
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While preparing tax data for my accountant this week, I took a break from the computer and committed to finishing the unsavory job. My interlude was not without concern for readers waiting perhaps for the next blog on lifestyle balance.
An accusation crossed my mind. Like other authors, I ought to be blogging more. Emphasis on the word “ought.”
Momentarily, I fell prey to the very frustration I’m disarming in my blog today. It’s number three among the eight rebuttals we hear from people striving to balance their lives. “I ought to be able to do as much as others do.” Sound familiar?
Interestingly, a few days ago a dear friend said something similar. “When I see all you’re doing, I think I should be doing more.” While she was comparing her “much” to my “much,” I was measuring myself by fellow writers for their more frequent blogs. And you can bet my “fellow authors” often cast side glances at someone doing one thing or another more than they.
Whew! The picture wears me out just verbalizing it. The nasty cycle is a whirl of comparison, competition, and copycat-ing.
If you allow the three C’s past your doorstep and in your house, you’ll be inviting three thieves. They’ll rob you of balance by distracting your concentration from what God has directed only you to do (be it ever so humble as taxes!).
Comparison will sink your esteem, forever pointing to someone you greatly admire. Competition will nurture jealousy with its assurances that you’ll never be equal to your role model. Copycat-ing will rob you of personal development and blind you to your own marvelous distinction. Suddenly you’re off kilter and there goes balance.
“What others are doing” is their business whether it’s superior, less, or merely different from what life requires of you.
Balance demands the deliberation of focus. Don’t let your eyes or attention turn you aside to “what others are doing.” Stick to your own tasks and do them joyfully to the glory of God. Besides, originals have more fun than copycats.
Anyone care to share which of the three C’s you’ve overcome or hope to? I’m giving a copy of Ins-pur-r-rational Stories for Cat Lovers to the third confessor who comments. Click the “comments” to the right of the copycats pictured above.
Comparison is futile. No amount of admiration will ever turn a train into an airplane. Keep your eyes on the track ahead. You may never fly, but you’ll never derail. --NA
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11 Comments
And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.
Hugs, Deb
Debbie says...
I overcame the Comparison C years ago Niki. I am much too busy, and old, to try to compare myself to anyone else. I have my yardwork, housework, crafts, an array of critters, a good man, a wonderful grown son, and 4 wonderful Grandchildren to keep focused. I simply don't have the time nor desire to compare myself to anyone else. We are each unique in what is important to us.
And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.
Hugs, Deb
Debbie says...
I overcame the Comparison C years ago Niki. I am much too busy, and old, to try to compare myself to anyone else. I have my yardwork, housework, crafts, an array of critters, a good man, a wonderful grown son, and 4 wonderful Grandchildren to keep focused. I simply don't have the time nor desire to compare myself to anyone else. We are each unique in what is important to us.
And I must say, I doubt if many would want to be compared with me, in some ways at least. I rarely sit down, am always mult tasking be it on the computer or while the TV is on. And if by chance my hands and/or is idol for more then a few moments, I actually think something is wrong with myself. I do however Niki, take time to read all your wonderful books. They really give me a "lift' for life when I need it.
Hugs, Deb
Debbie, I think that aging helps a lot with the reduction of comparing. With age and satisfying occupations and usefulness, who wants to trade places with another? My mother used to say, "If everyone threw their problems into the street and left them for anyone to pick-up, we'll all return to our own troubles and take them back home." So why wish to be someone else or waste time on the effort?
Cindy Scinto says...
Oh, Niki--this is so true. People especially compare themselves to me because of my health. They are intimidated by how much I get done. But they don't see that part of my schedule is for exercise, rest, quiet time, and even sleeping late on some days. When I say I am busy with a "full" schedule, rest time is included. But even I get overdone--so thank you for this reminder.
I'm also sensitive about the truth in saying, "I'm very busy." Because like you, those full days include my time alone with God, a short nap if necessary, walking and stretching, and other balancing actions. But too frequently, when people say they're busy, they mean they're frenetic and are living quite unbalanced lives.
Thank you!
(another) Niki
Niki Turner says...
Wonderful post! Avoiding the comparison trap is so hard sometimes. As a pastor's wife it hits hard when you start looking at church numbers and building size and so forth. My husband always reminds me of the verse that says "comparing ourselves among ourselves, this is not wise!"
Thank you!
(another) Niki
Hi "Another Niki", Not many of us spell our name this way! Bless your heart as you serve in the sensitive but powerful role of pastor's wife. I hold the highest esteem for women filling that ministry. But numbers mean little; he saved the Israelites by few and my many. I almost used the Bible verse you quoted for the end of my blog. Not only is it unwise to compare ourselves, it leads to feelings of superiority or despair. Keeping focused on Jesus and his personal leadership of our lives keeps us steady. Thanks for posting! You're the third to comment. You won the book! Please send your snail mail address to niki@nikianderson.net.
Tina says...
Ok Nikki I think I am the third cofessor on your blog...lol. It is kind of funny because I never thought of my self as suffering from one of the 3 "C"'s but more recently I have found myself doing just that..."comparrison". It has come from being with such inspiring and wonderful women in Oasis, they all are such a blessing but when I hear of time in other countries, the amount of missionary work done, and the things they plan in the future it is difficult not to look back (or forward) with my own life and wish I had sought more of that kind of service and experience. I love your very thought provoking blogs.
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